An old fellow was celebrating 81 years on this Earth.

He spoke to his toes. "Hello, toes!" he said. "How are you, toes? You know, you are 81 today. Oh, the times we've had! Remember we walked in the park in the summer every Sunday afternoon. The times we waltzed on the dance floor? Happy Birthday, toes!"

"Hello, knees," he continued. "How are you, knees? You know you're 81 today. Oh, the times we've had! Remember when we marched in the parade? Oh the hurdles we've jumped together. Happy Birthday knees!"

Then, he looked down at his crotch. "Hello Willie! You little bugger, if you were alive today, you'd be 81."