"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy." - Tom Clancy

"You know 'that look' women get when they want sex? Me neither." - Steve Martin

"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand." - Woody Allen

"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night." _ Rodney Dangerfield

"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL." - Lynn Lavner

"Leaving sex to the feminists is like letting your dog vacation at the taxidermist." - Matt Barry

"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope." - Camille Paglia

"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships." - Sharon Stone

"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is." - Barbara Bush

"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place." - Billy Crystal

"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house." - Rod Stewart

"The problem is that God gave man a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time." - Robin Williams